Japan is experiencing a rise in alternative family structures, including single mothers who choose not to marry and couples opting for sexless marriages by choice.
great news for me, as it increases the pool of unfullfilled housewives .from my over two decade whoring experience in Japan, a significant percentage of these women have never had an orgasm, so they dont know what theyre missing. But once I provide these sexless housewives with an orgasm, once i have their pituitary glands flood their brains with oxytocin, its over, and they become my stalkers. the problem is these shoushoku danshi japanese men, these herbivore japanese men, who are useless sexually. That is the narrative from literally every japanese woman I've bedded. Unfortunately, my black passenger days are behind me. And as such, I have only one or two housewives, as opposed to ten or so. Priorities have changed: I'm raising a daughter now, thats what i live for now. Plus, at 60, my libido has nosedived. Most men would freak out. But for me? Hallelujah? I can get projects done now. But I miss the black passenger days sometimes. Especially when the housewives at my daughter's kindergarten complain to me about how mura mura they are and how useless their husbands are.
Thank you for reading and adding a detailed account of your first-hand experience with this phenomenon. You have, essentially, answered a key question about how for many in sexless marriages - at least among women - lack of sexual satisfaction is a real problem. It sounds like you have helped, at least for a while, to fill that void in the lives of many dissatisfied women. In any case, it sounds like you have a new top priority. Thanks again for sharing your unique perspective.
I'm both surprised and puzzled by this information. I don't know anything about sex in Japan or the attitude of Japanese people to sex; but I should have thought that a fulfilling sex life was important for a person's overall psychological health and well being. So the reason for Japan's shrinking population is not cost-of-living/economic factors, but an aversion to sex in general? Has something changed to cause this? Seems quite sad.
Well, there are probably many reasons for the shrinking population, but the trend toward sexless marriage is certainly part of the picture. If the Japanese government doesn't allow more immigration, at the rate they're going the population will soon fall below 100 million people.
As I was first reading I thought for sure that the reason had to be the inclusion of elderly couples in the data. What a surprise to see the percentages hold true for younger couples! Way back in the 80s I knew a Japanese couple in their late thirties who I guess had a “friendship marriage “. At the time it seemed strange to me although they seemed happy enough. Maybe they were just ahead of the trend! I like the AI generated photos. I saw you were using them before but then I thought you had stopped using them.
Kate -- As always, thanks for reading and leaving a comment. Yes, I was skeptical of the data too, but it's true. Live and let live in my book. Thanks for the positive feedback on the AI images. It was surprisingly difficult to prepare a prompt that would not be rejected for this topic. The image generators seem to be trained to reject requests for certain topics, including the subject of this article.
While I am aware that the term "beta male" may be considered offensive by many, it is a way of describing how the Japanese refer to modern, relatively passive men as soshokukei (草食系, herbivore). This term is used to describe people (mostly men) who take a calm and reserved approach to relationships and romance. In contrast, the word nikushokukei (肉食系, carnivore) is used to describe traditional alpha males.
Conventional wisdom holds that traditional gender roles and expectations can sometimes limit men's emotional expression and assertiveness. In addition, economic and social pressures, such as the high cost of living and a declining job market, can lead some men to feel insecure and powerless. Japan's economy has been in the doldrums since about 1990, and real wages have essentially been flat to slightly declining since then.
Of course, I am throwing around many gross generalizations. The terms soshokukei and nikushokukei are only general tendencies, and they cannot explain all of an individual's personality and behavior.
That's another good question. While the answer depends on the individual, my gut feeling is that the fantasy world of anime has something to do with it. I am curious to know what others think.
For example, in the first photo, the eyes, the smiles, the lighting, and the woman’s right arm (Princess of Wales syndrome). In the third one, the eyes (too big). There’s something unnerving about images that are almost natural, rather like figures at Madame Tussaud’s. I suppose AI is still relatively primitive and will only get better. Interesting to see that Kate Elwood likes the images, though.
Got it. Thanks for the specific feedback. Yes, while AI image generators (at least the versions available to the general public for free at this point) are probably still in their infancy, it is an amazing technology. Sorry to make you uneasy, though. You probably should not watch some of the podcasts. I have used a lot of AI images in the podcasts I have produced so far. In any case, while I will probably continue to use AI image generators because of their flexibility, I will be on the lookout for unnatural poses, etc. that may upset some readers.
Very interesting. Would be helpful to discuss age of marriage I think. If women get married after 30 (especially after 35), their chance to have kids is very limited by biology. If they are older and working all the time as well, it would also be harder to make time for sex. Japan doesn't need 20 something women in the workforce. It needs them raising families, and then, after that critical job is done, they can join the workforce in their 30s and work for 40 or 50 years if they want to. That seems like a radical change, but it's much better than the alternative of extinction or wholesale replacement by inviting in workers from elsewhere to take the place of the Japanese not being born!
Thank you for reading, for your positive feedback, and for your novel suggestion, which would indeed be a radical change.
Japanese women typically marry between the ages of 28 and 30. The average age of the mother at the birth of her first child is just under 31.
Japanese women generally find it difficult to return to the workforce full-time after childbirth because of the long-held view that mothers are expected to take the lead in childcare, limited childcare options that are both affordable and reliable-especially for infants, a work culture that typically requires long hours and limited flexibility in work schedules, skills gaps and missed promotions when women take time off for dedicated childcare, and, in some cases, company policies that discourage women from returning full-time after childbirth (beyond legally mandated maternity leave).
So while I am not saying that your suggestion has no merit, it would require a sea change to implement.
You could have government policy both discouraging the hiring of younger unmarried women (e.g., tax penalties) and encouraging the hiring of 30 or 40 something married moms (e.g., tax incentives). (You'd also want cultural change too--movies/dramas should have happy endings with multiple kids. Japanese movies are bad at this historically.). Once kids are like 4+, they can start going to government funded preschool, which I think they already have. Moms in the workforce (especially with 3+ children) should be viewed as national saviors, not duty shirkers.
It's pretty simple and makes a lot of sense when you think about it. Most people haven't though. Hope they figure it out before it's too late. Japan is a very cool country!
Thank you for sharing your perspective and creative ideas. You hit the nail on the head when you alluded to tax policy.
The threshold of 1.3 million yen (about US$8,300) is a key parameter as it relates to second earners in Japan, which usually refers to female spouses.
- Social Security: Earning more than 1.3 million yen annually pushes a worker above the threshold for mandatory enrollment in Japan's social security system. This means they will have to start paying premiums for the National Pension and National Health Insurance, which can reduce their net income by a lot - up to 300,000 yen per year.
- Spousal Benefits: In some cases, exceeding 1.3 million yen may affect eligibility for spousal benefits tied to the primary earner's employment, such as health insurance coverage or allowances. However, this practice is becoming less common.
Especially considering the significant depreciation of the yen against the U.S. dollar, this figure seems very low. An upward revision of the threshold is necessary, if the current rules are to be maintained. Alternatively, perhaps a more comprehensive revision of the current system to encourage more women to work full-time would be even better.
This was a surprise to read. Makes me kind of sad that the sex part of relationships is dwindling at such a young age. Do they have things like couples retreats in Japan?
As far as I know, Japan does not have a widespread "couples retreat" industry like in the U.S. While travel agencies can help with the logistics, it seems that most couples are on their own when it comes to planning such a retreat.
By the way, while this is obviously a serious issue, I was expecting some sort of joke in your message! Just kidding!
great news for me, as it increases the pool of unfullfilled housewives .from my over two decade whoring experience in Japan, a significant percentage of these women have never had an orgasm, so they dont know what theyre missing. But once I provide these sexless housewives with an orgasm, once i have their pituitary glands flood their brains with oxytocin, its over, and they become my stalkers. the problem is these shoushoku danshi japanese men, these herbivore japanese men, who are useless sexually. That is the narrative from literally every japanese woman I've bedded. Unfortunately, my black passenger days are behind me. And as such, I have only one or two housewives, as opposed to ten or so. Priorities have changed: I'm raising a daughter now, thats what i live for now. Plus, at 60, my libido has nosedived. Most men would freak out. But for me? Hallelujah? I can get projects done now. But I miss the black passenger days sometimes. Especially when the housewives at my daughter's kindergarten complain to me about how mura mura they are and how useless their husbands are.
Thank you for reading and adding a detailed account of your first-hand experience with this phenomenon. You have, essentially, answered a key question about how for many in sexless marriages - at least among women - lack of sexual satisfaction is a real problem. It sounds like you have helped, at least for a while, to fill that void in the lives of many dissatisfied women. In any case, it sounds like you have a new top priority. Thanks again for sharing your unique perspective.
Those AI images are really scary.
What, in particular, caught your attention?
In the first image their fingers look unnatural.
That's true. Perhaps AI image generators will get good at the details in record time. They seem to have trouble with eyes, too.
I'm both surprised and puzzled by this information. I don't know anything about sex in Japan or the attitude of Japanese people to sex; but I should have thought that a fulfilling sex life was important for a person's overall psychological health and well being. So the reason for Japan's shrinking population is not cost-of-living/economic factors, but an aversion to sex in general? Has something changed to cause this? Seems quite sad.
Well, there are probably many reasons for the shrinking population, but the trend toward sexless marriage is certainly part of the picture. If the Japanese government doesn't allow more immigration, at the rate they're going the population will soon fall below 100 million people.
As I was first reading I thought for sure that the reason had to be the inclusion of elderly couples in the data. What a surprise to see the percentages hold true for younger couples! Way back in the 80s I knew a Japanese couple in their late thirties who I guess had a “friendship marriage “. At the time it seemed strange to me although they seemed happy enough. Maybe they were just ahead of the trend! I like the AI generated photos. I saw you were using them before but then I thought you had stopped using them.
Kate -- As always, thanks for reading and leaving a comment. Yes, I was skeptical of the data too, but it's true. Live and let live in my book. Thanks for the positive feedback on the AI images. It was surprisingly difficult to prepare a prompt that would not be rejected for this topic. The image generators seem to be trained to reject requests for certain topics, including the subject of this article.
The reality is that they are not sexless at all. They are not just doing it with their partners. If you live in japan you know what I mean
Ah, the devil must be in the details! I suppose the surveys didn't ask that question.
sexless, ageless, and priceless?
More like don’t have sex with each other.
Welcome to marriage
I. Have. No. Words. Although aged out of having children?? Thank God I’m not Japanese!!!!!
It does seem surprising at first glance.
Sex is overrated in the western world
How did the culture and government "castrated" men mentally, and successfully took the manhood out of them ?
Where are the Japanese shoguns, emperors, warriors and swordsman?
Great question!
While I am aware that the term "beta male" may be considered offensive by many, it is a way of describing how the Japanese refer to modern, relatively passive men as soshokukei (草食系, herbivore). This term is used to describe people (mostly men) who take a calm and reserved approach to relationships and romance. In contrast, the word nikushokukei (肉食系, carnivore) is used to describe traditional alpha males.
Conventional wisdom holds that traditional gender roles and expectations can sometimes limit men's emotional expression and assertiveness. In addition, economic and social pressures, such as the high cost of living and a declining job market, can lead some men to feel insecure and powerless. Japan's economy has been in the doldrums since about 1990, and real wages have essentially been flat to slightly declining since then.
Of course, I am throwing around many gross generalizations. The terms soshokukei and nikushokukei are only general tendencies, and they cannot explain all of an individual's personality and behavior.
Who are their modern day heroes? Masculine characters?
That's another good question. While the answer depends on the individual, my gut feeling is that the fantasy world of anime has something to do with it. I am curious to know what others think.
I must fly to Japan and bring water to the desert.
Haha!
For example, in the first photo, the eyes, the smiles, the lighting, and the woman’s right arm (Princess of Wales syndrome). In the third one, the eyes (too big). There’s something unnerving about images that are almost natural, rather like figures at Madame Tussaud’s. I suppose AI is still relatively primitive and will only get better. Interesting to see that Kate Elwood likes the images, though.
Got it. Thanks for the specific feedback. Yes, while AI image generators (at least the versions available to the general public for free at this point) are probably still in their infancy, it is an amazing technology. Sorry to make you uneasy, though. You probably should not watch some of the podcasts. I have used a lot of AI images in the podcasts I have produced so far. In any case, while I will probably continue to use AI image generators because of their flexibility, I will be on the lookout for unnatural poses, etc. that may upset some readers.
Very interesting. Would be helpful to discuss age of marriage I think. If women get married after 30 (especially after 35), their chance to have kids is very limited by biology. If they are older and working all the time as well, it would also be harder to make time for sex. Japan doesn't need 20 something women in the workforce. It needs them raising families, and then, after that critical job is done, they can join the workforce in their 30s and work for 40 or 50 years if they want to. That seems like a radical change, but it's much better than the alternative of extinction or wholesale replacement by inviting in workers from elsewhere to take the place of the Japanese not being born!
Thank you for reading, for your positive feedback, and for your novel suggestion, which would indeed be a radical change.
Japanese women typically marry between the ages of 28 and 30. The average age of the mother at the birth of her first child is just under 31.
Japanese women generally find it difficult to return to the workforce full-time after childbirth because of the long-held view that mothers are expected to take the lead in childcare, limited childcare options that are both affordable and reliable-especially for infants, a work culture that typically requires long hours and limited flexibility in work schedules, skills gaps and missed promotions when women take time off for dedicated childcare, and, in some cases, company policies that discourage women from returning full-time after childbirth (beyond legally mandated maternity leave).
So while I am not saying that your suggestion has no merit, it would require a sea change to implement.
Yes, it's clearly sea change or extinction.
You could have government policy both discouraging the hiring of younger unmarried women (e.g., tax penalties) and encouraging the hiring of 30 or 40 something married moms (e.g., tax incentives). (You'd also want cultural change too--movies/dramas should have happy endings with multiple kids. Japanese movies are bad at this historically.). Once kids are like 4+, they can start going to government funded preschool, which I think they already have. Moms in the workforce (especially with 3+ children) should be viewed as national saviors, not duty shirkers.
It's pretty simple and makes a lot of sense when you think about it. Most people haven't though. Hope they figure it out before it's too late. Japan is a very cool country!
Thank you for sharing your perspective and creative ideas. You hit the nail on the head when you alluded to tax policy.
The threshold of 1.3 million yen (about US$8,300) is a key parameter as it relates to second earners in Japan, which usually refers to female spouses.
- Social Security: Earning more than 1.3 million yen annually pushes a worker above the threshold for mandatory enrollment in Japan's social security system. This means they will have to start paying premiums for the National Pension and National Health Insurance, which can reduce their net income by a lot - up to 300,000 yen per year.
- Spousal Benefits: In some cases, exceeding 1.3 million yen may affect eligibility for spousal benefits tied to the primary earner's employment, such as health insurance coverage or allowances. However, this practice is becoming less common.
Especially considering the significant depreciation of the yen against the U.S. dollar, this figure seems very low. An upward revision of the threshold is necessary, if the current rules are to be maintained. Alternatively, perhaps a more comprehensive revision of the current system to encourage more women to work full-time would be even better.
Well, my first reaction was I’m glad we were above average. But we are getting older so things are changing. I’ll leave that to your imagination.
It can be dangerous to leave anything to my imagination!
This was a surprise to read. Makes me kind of sad that the sex part of relationships is dwindling at such a young age. Do they have things like couples retreats in Japan?
Thank you for reading and leaving your feedback.
As far as I know, Japan does not have a widespread "couples retreat" industry like in the U.S. While travel agencies can help with the logistics, it seems that most couples are on their own when it comes to planning such a retreat.
By the way, while this is obviously a serious issue, I was expecting some sort of joke in your message! Just kidding!